Thursday, 2 April 2015

B is for Birthday: How To Throw A Birthday Party For A Cat

Today in my A to Z Blogging Challenge , B is for Birthday...or burthday...whatever...

Cats like parties too and even if you don't know their exact birthdate, you can celebrate their adoptaversary. However, there are a few things you should know before getting out the rabbit jelly and Tom and Jerry Ice Cream.

Party Paraphernalia: Go to an expensive shop and spend loads of cash on birthday items like party bags, toys and games. The next day, throw it all away because the only things your cat was interested in were the cardboard boxes it all came in.

Party food: Go to an expensive fishmonger's and butcher's and spend loads of cash on top quality fish and meat. Take hours lovingly preparing it. The next day, throw it all out because your cat has filled up on spiders and woodlice and turned his nose up at it.

Invitations: Go to an expensive stationer's and stock up on gold-embossed cards with a picture of a mouse on them. Take them home to write out to all your friends and neighbours. Half an hour later, throw them all away because your cat has shredded them in a fit of pique.

Music: Spare no expense in hiring a top band. When they turn up install them in a marquee in the garden that cost an arm and a leg to hire. Ten minutes later ask them all to go home because your cat hates the noise and is hiding under the garden shed and refuses to come out.

Gifts: Go to an expensive emporium and spend half a day and a month's wages picking out a state-of-the art cat toy. The next day dismantle it and put it in the attic because, apart from one sniff, your cat has shown no interest in it whatsoever.

Birthday Cake: See under Party Food.

Guests: Do ask everyone in the world you want to impress - your boss, your mother-in-law, the new neighbours - and then hide away from them for the next five years because your cat dumped a half-chewed mouse at their feet and then threw up all over their shoes.

Never miss a funny picture, mad video or hot cat news. Subscribe to That's Purrfect and we'll email you every time the website is updated. All you have to do is pop your email address in the 'subscribe' form in the panel. 


  1. Very good advice :) Sorta the same when you throw a party for a toddler.

  2. Great post for the letter B, the ribbon gif had me laughing out loud (sooo true lol). Good luck with the A-Z Challenge this month!

  3. lol Your post made me smile and then burst out laughing towards the end. Thanks for that. :)

  4. Merkel, the older of the two cats who lives here, is very anti-social so there would be no point inviting people to a party for her. She hates other people and sometimes she even hates us.

  5. Delightful post. And the ribbon pic is spot on. My two elder kit-kats who love decorum above all, absolutely lose it when long, stringy, curly, bouncy, it-must-be-pounced upon, thingies appear!

  6. Thank you everyone for your comments. I'll be round to visit everyone's blogs again soon. XXX

  7. True, true, true...all of it! And why is it that cats have a perfect sense of timing when it comes to puking up hairballs at the feet of company? It would seem they see this as some sort of social overture! :-)

  8. Aw, these are great! So funny. The ribbons are my favorite.


Thank you for your commenting; it's purrfect.