HERE are a couple of tips from one cat to another, particularly useful in the middle of the night:
- Jump on the mantelpiece or dressing-table and swipe off anything standing there. This is useful for waking up any sleeping humans.
- Dive-bomb your human from the bedhead or nearby furniture to wake it up. Aim at groin, breast or head.
This pocket-sized little gem would make a purrfect gift for a cat lover. It's full of hilarious one-liners and anecdotes which will resonate with any of us who are owned by a cat.
As the writer so succinctly puts: "Remember. Humans have the mental age of a one-week-old blind kitten. They cannot express themselves in body language because they have no tail and no whiskers; their hair can't stand up and their ears are completely inflexible. They can learn only a few words from the huge body-language feline vocabulary."
We are also told that though humans cannot speak Cat, they vocalise repeatedly. Most of their vocalisations are meaningless and can be completely ignored.
For now, a couple more tips:
- To get a male human off an armchair, jump on the back of it, hold down his head with a firm paw and lick his bald patch. Purring right into the ear is one of the kindest ways to tell a human.
- Anything not nailed down is a cat toy, except a new cat toy.
- Walk over to the computer keyboard, being careful to press down the keys. Use your body to shield the interesting additions to the screen. Stand on one key so that a character repeats itself endlessly.
I am an amazon.com and amazon.co.uk affiliate and it would be lovely if you could help me keep this site running by using the links above to buy from Amazon. For other goods you can use THIS LINK . Thank you!
Never miss a funny picture, mad video or hot cat news. Subscribe to That's Purrfect and we'll email you every time the website is updated. All you have to do is pop your email address in the 'subscribe' form in the panel.