Friday, 19 August 2016

The Five Second Rule

 
It's Friday - the day Carlton takes over my blog. Views are his own and not necessarily, in fact, rarely, shared by the blog owner.

The Five Second Rule

by Carlton Cat

THE Mr dropped half a sausage roll on the floor, swooped down, picked it up and ate it. I didn't see anything wrong with that but the Mrs went ballistic.

"That's disgusting!" she screamed. "What about all those germs! You'll make yourself ill!" On and on she ranted while the Mr calmly carried on eating.

Then she said: "Yuk! Carlton's been walking over that floor."

My ears pricked up. Yuk? What do you mean, 'yuk'? I'll have you know I spent ten minutes this morning cleaning my paws. You could eat off my paws. My paws are cleaner than a sterilised piccalilli pickle jar.

The Mr smiled. Wiped his hands down the side of his trousers and said: "Don't worry. I kept to the five second rule."

"Which is….?" she asked.

"If you drop something on the floor and pick it up within five seconds it's safe to eat. No bacteria. None. Zilch."

"That is patently ridiculous," the Mrs replied. "If you get botulism and die a horrible death, rolling around in agony, it'll be your own fault." With that she filled a bucket with water and what looked like a gallon of disinfectant and got the mop.

"Horse. Bolted." said Mr, a comment which only made the Mrs go redder and start scrubbing the floor as if she were expecting a visit from half a dozen crawling fragile babies.

The Mr booted up the computer and found this:


He showed it to the Mrs. She was not impressed. My paws, clean as they are, are now over my ears.



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5 comments:

Liz A. said...

They actually did a study that said the five second rule... wasn't as out of the question as you'd think. I think it totally depends on what it was and how it fell, though.

Jo said...

And also on where it fell and how recently it had been cleaned.

pilch92 15andmeowing said...

I like the chart. I would eat something off the floor after an hour, I figure I ingest cat hair every day with so many around.

The Island Cats said...

Too bad you weren't quicker to grab that sausage, Carlton.

Darla M Sands said...

Awesome chart. Thank you for the chuckle.